I'm addicted to...Well, me!
I don't like the word addiction because it infers that I am a victim. I believe that all my addictions are things I am choosing. There are many things I choose over Jesus, Sarah, and my children. Most of the things I choose over them are to please my self. Most of the time I can rationalize it by saying "I need (fill in the blank)."This makes me wonder how much I actually need. Is there any non-physical need that Jesus can not fill? I don't think there is. Some of my psychologically knowledgeable friends might tell me otherwise - they might tell me that I have emotional needs. But I believe that Yahweh can fill those if I trust he will provide.
I feel trapped by that tension between want and need.
posted by Adam Wolfgang @ 12:21 AM
1 Comments
1 Comments:
recently I've spent a lot of time with a recovered meth addict (coworker) who has given me a glimpse inside a world that is mysterious to me. Listening to her, I believe the following about addiction: it does start as a choice. But it quicly takes on a life of it's own, and we become a victim of our own choice because we can't get out. Many of us are blessed that we don't make the initial choice to step into addiction. I too am addicted to myself, and all that AA stuff about a higher power isn't just propaganda, it's because like abuse, a codependent relationship, or a roller coaster, we can't get out of addiction without someone else's help. Believing that we can just deepens our self-addiction.
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home